If you think scandal and drama only happen in remote villages and in Eastlands, you are mistaken. The dung also hits the fan in Kileleshwa and Lavington, too.
It is just that these loaded folks know how to keep their dirty linen firmly in the laundry basket, unlike the rest of us who wash and air it in the open.
Thanks to the gated homes that guarantee the owners maximum security and privacy, drama in the suburbs is high-tech but ultra secret, unless you are a watchmen or house girl in the know.
I am a full-blown Eastlander so you are wondering how I got wind of this juicy soap opera. I have a friend who is a "squatter" among the high and mighty. She lives in a pint-sized Sh15,000 servant quarters in Kileleshwa instead of putting up in filth and murk in a two-bedroomed house in Eastlands.
So it happens my friend’s landlord, who happens to live in the main house, recently busted her husband with his gay lover in their marital bed.
What really happened is the couple has been together for less than a year, but their matrimony has been far from holy going by the number of verbal disputes sorted out on the balcony of their expansive bedroom.
The marriage was not as blissful as the wedding, which is said to have cost a tidy sum and was as lavish as they come. But that is not surprising because, as they say, the more posh the wedding, the shorter it lasts.
Mr Okinyi was a businessman while Mrs Okinyi was a top honcho in a blue chip company, so she was always working late. The hubby, who operated from home, had a suspiciously flexible work schedule and a close confidant and business partner.
It seems this relationship went beyond business as the truth was the two were actually lovers.
So one day, the wife came back home unusually early. My friend also happened to be around as she was on leave.
The watchman, being the man’s ally, tried to signal him that things were getting elephant, but Okinyi’s phone was off. As the woman made her way upstairs to freshen up, the watchman tried to distract her attention using flimsy excuses.
"Madam usiende juu, mzee ako busy sana na kazi. Alisema asisumbuliwe (Madam please your husband is working on a serious project and he said nobody should disturb him)," pleaded the watchman.
But Mrs Okinyi, a no-nonsense woman who calls the shots at work, pushed the watchman aside and made her way to the bedroom.
The door was ajar. What she saw made her regret the day she said ‘I do’. She left in a huff only to come after a few weeks to collect her stuff. Later on, she filed for divorce and the matter is still pending in the family court.