THE UNROMANTIC KENYAN MEN

Well let me introduce you to true 'romance'. There's a reason why people say "it's the small things that matter" or "it's the thought that counts". Before we test the kenyan men of today what do the men of other countries do that qualifies as romantic compared to today?

Let's list some actions that were perceived as romantic; they surprised their women with candle-lit dinners, they bought flowers, they took walks to the beach (assuming you were near one), they held hands and told fairy-tale stories as they took an evening walk, they to ice cream parlours and fed each other ice cream (well some did), they went to drive-in cinemas and ate salt-less stale popcorn (some of you are wondering what are those, that means you were probably suckling at that time), they would walk the woman to her father's gate or door and last but not least they wrote 7 to 10 page letter by hand to express their affections. Some of you copied lyrics from several artists and merged the words hoping the she wouldn't recognise the lyrics.
Now after evaluating that list you would probably say that men back in the day were genuinely romantic; they had game as some would put it. Well to some extent that may be the case. However the fundamental factor was that whether it was out of love or not, the women of yesterday actually appreciated those gestures. You could see it in her eyes and if you were lucky you might get a peck on the cheek or to top it all off you would be the talk of your hood because you received a kiss. They would even define the kiss by how long it lasted (trust me it was a big deal back then). Personally I would like to say I'm somewhat a romantic at heart but the harsh unpredictable social environment has a lot going against men.

Women will complain that men are un-romantic and yet very few of you actual know what romance is. Some women think that an overly romantic guy is one who adapts some feminine traits, you know what I mean? Let's say a guy could only afford to cook you spinach and ugali for your romantic dinner, isn't it the thought that counts? Then again if you feel men are NOT that, why not cook yourself a prawn or lobster dish with sensual aroma and call it a candle lit dinner for ONE and let's see how orgasmic that night goes! It's not an excuse but times are hard, some of the luxuries that were affordable back then are not easily sustainable today. Hence why I always say don't introduce to each other life styles that you just can't keep up with.
Oh and that other thing, 'flowers'. Do women know that for most men flowers have little or no sentimental value at all? Over years of offering flowers we have cheated ourselves that we understand and cherish each petal. Some men may beg to differ but that's because you have brain washed yourself over many years or society dictates that only loving men offer flowers as a sign of love. Personally I think flowers are not the best symbol for love: for one they tend to die in a few days whether in water or not. What does that say about the relationship eventuality!!!! I'm just saying! Yes there's no science that links dead flowers with relationship outcomes but for me there's a link. I prefer to offer a cactus, it doesn't need to be watered frequently plus its erect posture depicts … if you get my drift... Every time I'm away from her she only needs to look at the cactus to positively remember me!
Then there's the 'taking a romantic walk'. Now in this day and age this romantic gesture may get you mugged or kidnapped, may be even killed depending on where you live. I would hate to be mid my ultimate lyrics then I feel a gun in my face, not a very romantic ending. I must admit though that men no longer hand write letters I guess technology has slowly phased that sentimental gesture. Now we have text messaging which is not romantic just straight to the point. Back then it was allowed to beat around the bush while courting with romantic words and actions, but today’s women themselves will tell a dude "get with the program tell me what you want so I can decide whether I want the same or not"
Is romance dying? We can debate that for years but it's not looking too good from where I stand. Do couples have meaningful pillow talk nowadays; do you? When was the last time you did something romantic or experienced a bit of romance? I am eager to hear your views because what may be perceived as romantic today may be tying a bow around a bottle of black ice, who knows?
In my opinion true romance can only be experienced over a period where a couple in love know each other inside out, remembering and cherishing moments or occasions shared together and over the years reliving those moments. Your first intimate kiss that made you say yes he or she is the one for me, your most memorable night out it could be a simple dinner or a night out clubbing and you both danced the night away. The moments and memories can be of anything, but it’s their significance that makes all the difference hence why you revisit them over and over in form of anniversaries. A time for you to share in love and spend quality time. The romantic dinner setting is great but if it is only occurring as a means to an end then it doesn't qualify to be in the 'hall of romance'. I wish that everyone reading this article can have those moments of pure happiness and have the pleasure of sharing with someone.